INSPIRASUNS

Yesterday was one of those days. It actually started off really positively. I was knocking things off the to-do list, I worked out early, got some great news from a friend, (thanks for the prayers this week by the way), it was going swimmingly you might say. But as the day moved on, little things started to crop up and nudge their way into and over the good things. Before I could blink it had gotten late and I still needed to make a run to the grocery store, oh and did I mention I was still in my workout attire with a hat on my head, (don’t judge, I work from my home office most of the time).

I grabbed a quick shower and made my way out the door. I needed to drop some things off at our storage unit, (yes we have those here, mainly for our Christmas items, we might have a tad too many, Nah, never too many, sorry I digress), so I went to a different grocery store than I normally do. When I walk in, I instantly see it is set up totally differently than what I’m accustomed to, so of course, it took twice as long to shop. Yep, the nudging of the good things out of my day continued and I was getting irritated. I managed to get the shopping completed and back out to the car I went, hoping to still have time to make dinner before midnight.

As I hustled out of the parking lot, making the turn onto the street, I caught a glimpse of what I believed was a homeless woman with a small child holding a sign. I was going too fast to read the sign and honestly, I didn’t see her until halfway into my turn. I have to admit my first thought was, “what are you doing out here with a small child in this busy parking lot, right next to a busy street”. My thoughts went to, is she really homeless, is she just doing this as a side job, there are places in this city for people in her situation. But then, my thoughts went to, what if she really is homeless, what if she’s too scared to be in a shelter with people she doesn’t know, what if she has a spouse who is forcing her to do something like this, what if, what if, what if… I was very, very conflicted, and I was mad at myself for not stopping to ask what her situation was, and how had she ended up here in this place holding this sign.

When I got home I was not in a good place, I was stewing about what I’d done, or should I say hadn’t done. My husband asked why I was mad and of course in my way I say, “I’m not mad”, and blamed it on having so many things still to do. The vision of this woman and the child stuck with me through the evening.

As I got ready for bed, I made my way to sit on my patio to talk with Father and ask for guidance. I found myself admitting I felt I had failed to do what he has asked us to do. I felt like I had let him down. I felt like I wasn’t good enough if that even makes sense. I had the opportunity to potentially make a difference with one of his children and I didn’t. It made me think of Mary and Joseph, they were there in Bethlehem with nowhere to go to give birth to the baby Jesus. At least the innkeeper gave them the stable, I didn’t even attempt that.

As I prayed for forgiveness and asked Father to open my heart and accept my apologies for failing him, for not being good enough to at least try to understand the situation, I looked up and a shooting star made its way through the sky. I paused and heard in my heart, “I gave my Son for you so you don’t ever have to feel not good enough. Learn and grow my child”. He always seems to know what we need.

I have learned, and I will continue to grow not only my relationship with God but in the works he wants me to do. Next time I will handle the situation differently and will pray for guidance as I do.

We’re all human my friends, we make mistakes, we don’t do things we should and we do things we shouldn’t. It’s ok, we have a loving God who knows everything about us and understands our shortcomings. We need to only recognize them when they happen, learn from them and make a difference the next time. We are good enough, we are God’s children.

Thanks for letting me share this morning in this little blog. Your support is so appreciated. Have a good day 🙂 .

Proverbs 3:27
Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it.